A friend of mine died last night. I got the call this morning at the coffee shop and automatically headed out the door, no-one needs to hear another’s phone conversation at 8am.  “She’s  gone” the person on the phone said and I thought she meant to hospice, it took me a minute  to understand that she meant  she is dead.  Gone.  She was here and then a puff of air from her lips and she was gone. I felt immediately bereft and tear struck and came  home to light a candle and reach out to her spirit as it passed over. I don’t know where her body is but I have been with her all day and am still. Keeping vigil as she leaves.

Despite our having seen each other almost daily for the last year and frequently for years before that, we had not discussed this goodbye moment. I feel she is at peace and I am glad of that. No more pain.

She was not pleased about dying, she did not want to go but she was resigned.  We had agreed years ago that there was no need for her, in my company, to cling to the bourgeois rules of her upbringing that masked her true temperament and predilections. I prefer what is real.   My friend had long understood this about me  Dying is about as real as it gets.

We talked about it from every angle  and repeatedly; there was no question death was coming for her.  We explored the metaphysical, philosophical, religious, pagan, social and cultural elements of death and dying. Sometimes the conversation was deep and profound, sometimes we rolled around laughing.  She had defied the medical odds and predictions for almost ten years but things were changing for the worse and she did not want to deal with invasive joy-robbing procedures. She was really clear about that; she had experienced them when she was first diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer.

This time there would be no “fighting” or “conquering” cancer for her, she would live with it until she could live with it no more and then she would depart. In the ten year passage since the diagnosis, she credited Phoenix Tears and other cannabinoids with keeping her alive and she had loved and laughed and experienced fun, pleasure and joy.

And now she’s gone. We agreed both that I would hear from her from the spirit world if that was possible. We laughed as we said it but we both hoped it to be true.

I first heard about  PEMF Light Therapy when a  clinic  a few blocks away from my house offered a free trial session. The timing was perfect.  With Type 2 Diabetes my blood sugar was out of control  and the mood swings that went along with that were really hard to live with. After months and months of denial  I had recently turned over(another) new leaf and was drinking vegetable juice every day, eating few carbs and no white foods and no sugar of any kind including fruits. . I was determined to cure the diabetes.  In order to exercise enough I had to get rid of the chronic pain I was experiencing.  Dr. Google had suggested Light Therapy may heal damaged tissue,  relieve pain, and even stimulate organs, that was enough  for me to try it.  I figured at the very least it would do me no harm; we are after all made of light and energy.

Besides the diabetes I have had Fibromyalgia for more than 20 years and despite my very best efforts the chronic pain and fatigue is energy-draining and discouraging. There is no cure, only maintenance and every time I hear of a new potential tool for the maintenance kit, I jump at it. The clinic session  was PEMF mat followed by Infra-Red Light Treatment for pain, inflammation and circulation. The first treatment certainly did me no harm and felt quite relaxing so I signed up for a month’s sessions.

For the first couple of days, such was the pain in my legs that I drove the few blocks to the clinic. I wasn’t sure if I could make it on foot or if my legs would suddenly give out as they sometimes did. When it was suggested I come twice a day I decided to drive once and walk once and though walking was still an effort, I could do it, a huge lift for my spirits.

My energy improved almost from the first session and the clinic assured me it was a cumulative process.  I consulted Dr Google again “Mitochondria, the battery packs of your cells, and how strong they are affects everything you do. What if you could charge up your mitochondria directly — in a sense, plug them in? PEMF therapy comes pretty close.”

I decided to meditate as I laid on the PEMF mat and became hyper aware of my body and exactly where pain and discomfort was centred which gave me the option to practice letting go.  The amount of tension we hold in our bodies with chronic pain really adds to the problem from clenched jaws to knotted guts.

I am six weeks along now, I reupped immediately, missing daily sessions only when I really have to. I see them as such powerful allies in my quest for optimum health. Somewhere in there I discovered I have kidney stones so we have thrown that into the mix of what needs attending to on the PEMF mat.  Some days are better than others – the Fibromyalgia flares up still but with less intensity. My feet hurt though they cramp less and I rarely wake up from leg cramps. I notice in my daily yoga stretches that I can go a lot further without strain than I could before.

Im sharing this experience because all of us in chronic pain are always looking for relief. If this helps anyone, I would be pleased.

Let there be Light.